Heavy D the Terminator

Heavy D the Terminator

Heavy D the Terminator

When I called to tell Mom good night after my concert, she told me she’d killed a big cockroach. She hates any kind of bug in a majorly phobic way. Her method? She poured PineSol on it. She won the PineSol at Bingo, one of her favorite prizes.

“That did the trick- it flipped right over with its legs in the air.”

This made me think of the house I grew up in on Westwood Lane. It was an old Florida house under big oak trees, and there were big spiders and big palmetto bugs. Lots of them. The South is pretty impressive in the bug area, especially with giant, flying palmetto bugs. Money was very tight, and we didn’t have the luxury of a fancy pest control company coming regularly to treat the house then as we both do today.

I will never forget the recurring scene…one of us would spot the offending spider or bug, and panic would ensue. Mom would run for her weapon and prepare for battle. Her weapon of choice back then? Hairspray. She would gingerly approach the evil multi-legged offender and begin spraying from about five feet away. The bug would inevitably begin flying at or crawling toward her, and she would add screaming to the spraying as she fought to the death, aerosol spray fogging the room. Eventually, whatever it was was frozen solid, entombed in the gooeyness of Final Net.

Thinking of it still brings a chuckle every time. Heavy D, the Terminator.


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